Requiem Masses & Funeral Services

[organist]

It's the text that matters! Will it comfort and support? I well remember a funeral where the PP agreed to the playing of a CD of a pop song beloved by the deceased at the end of the liturgy and the family were distraught. I attended a Methodist funeral recently of a 16 year old murdered in a gang fight. He was a great lad and just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. The support of that congregation was palpable with clapping and vocal agreement with the speakers. The hymns were all of the 19th century chorus variety but they were right for the occasion. The last choice was "God be with you til we meet again".

[pirate]

My Dad was not a Catholic - in fact he claimed not to have any faith at all, although he had been baptised and confirmed in the Church of England, many years ago. We had his funeral last week; not a Catholic one, obviously, but leaning heavily on the relevant bits of the Order of Christian Funerals, led by a Franciscan friar, with a mix of poetry and Scripture (Paul to the Corinthians on love), and I sang, unaccompanied, ps62/63 'O God, you are my God alone' from the Iona psalm book. It wasn't a Mass or even a Catholic funeral, and the vasty bulk of the congregation were neither Catholics nor churchgoers, so I felt able to avoid hymns altogether. He came in, in his wicker coffin, to 'Parce mihi domine' sung by the Hilliard Ensemble, with Jan Garbarek saxophoning at a great height, and our recessional was 'El Carretero' from the Buena Vista Social Club, which he had specifically requested, all about life being hard but good, anad the world beautiful, and how he was going to the mountains to lay down his burden, which was pretty perfect, for my Dad.

The undertaker had asked what music I wanted ('Is it anything wierd, Annie, love?' - I had to spell it all out for him very carefully) and then the music was downloaded direct to the crematorium by the licensing agents, very effective and efficient.

I wouldn't have used CDs at a funeral for a functioning Catholic assembly, used to singing and liturgical structure; but for this occasion, part funeral/goodbye, part remembering and smiling through tears, it worked very well. It was a good liturgy, though I say it myself, commending him to God (in whom I have faith!!) and comforting his family, who were touched by the texts we had chosen and the music they heard.

[VML]

Please can I revive this thread with another question: What do parishes do about flowers at funerals? For many years we had a PP who required flowers to be removed from the coffin and placed at the foot of the altar in order for a large pall to cover the coffin, and crucifix and missal or Bible placed on top.
My father died earlier this year and his PP does not even allow family flowers into the church:( In any case the funeral director said that if there was more than one trubute, he would not put any of them on the coffin, not to offend anyone for lack of space!)
Now with a new PP here, the pall, (which, to be honest, was overlarge cream polyester which made it look like an unmade bed..) has been quietly omitted, and the family flowers left on top, which still usually leaves space for the cucufix and missal, and we could always use a narrow stole to represent the white baptismal garment.

[musicus]

Why not form a small group of singers dedicated to singing at funerals/requiems?

I believe this is commonly done in the USA. Has anyone here been involved in such a choir, who could tell us about it?

[festivaltrumpet]

Now with a new PP here, the pall, (which, to be honest, was overlarge cream polyester which made it look like an unmade bed..) has been quietly omitted, and the family flowers left on top, which still usually leaves space for the cucufix and missal, and we could always use a narrow stole to represent the white baptismal garment.

A stole should not be used as a minimalist pall. The stole has a specific symbolism pertaining to the ordained ministry, it is not equivalent to the alb.

[organist]

The question of the pall - if it looks like an unmade bed someone needs to iron it! Actually I think flowers look lovely on a coffin as long as there is room for the Christian symbols. I have asked for my hymnbook and prayer book to be placed there withe cross and gospel book when the time comes. One Catenian friend had his cloth cap which was just right! This week I played for the funeral of an old Catenian friend who loved music. I played for his wife's funeral in February and Derek came over beforehand and asked for "Jesu joy of man's desiring" which luckily I found in a book next to the organ so I made sure I had my copy this time. All went well and the parish choir sang. Oddly "May the choirs of angels" was sung right at the end after the final hymn "To be a pilgrim". It would have been better placed during the censing of the coffin I thought.

[Dot]

I used to sing with a "scratch" group that provided music for funerals in the Anglican church. The MD of the local parish church would just ring round to see who was available for each occasion. There would normally be about eight of us and we were paid £25 a head. The musical repertoire was fairly predictable, with Psalm 121 (I lift up my eyes to the mountains) and Rutter's "The Lord bless you and keep you" featuring regularly. The MD has now moved on to Guildford Cathedral and I am out of the loop.

Dot

[docmattc]

There would normally be about eight of us and we were paid £25 a head.

I don't want to side track this thread into another "payment for organists" thread, lets keep that discussion elsewhere, but that's a lot of money then. It's what I get for playing at a funeral, ie £25 is the total musical expense for the funeral. Are families prepared to shell out this much for a choir? I guess its peanuts though compared with the price of a coffin.

[Boadicea]

There's a leaflet available on the Archdiocese of Birmingham website, to "help Catholics plan their Funeral Arrangements".

http://www.birminghamdiocese.org.uk/assets/pdf/FUNERAL%20MASS%20LEAFLET.pdf

It all came about with the best of intentions, after a couple of instances where elderly parishioners died, and their non-church-going families arranged their funerals without getting in touch with the church at all.

But - in view of what we were saying about the need for formation, in order to move on from the idea of the funeral liturgy being all about 'my favourite hymn', is this going to help us with that? Or is it, rather, confirming that it really is all about your favourite hymns after all?

[musicus]

Pity they didn't proofread that leaflet: "the resurrections [sic] of Jesus Christ form [sic] the dead" !

And yes, it does encourage the 'favourite hymns' approach.

[NorthernTenor]

The last two funeral services I've been to were a Caholic and an Anglican one, respectively, for members of the same family. The latter was from the Book of Common Prayer, preceded by prayers at the reception of the coffin. The dignity of the Anglican service and the unashamed solemnity of the occasion were generally felt, by young and old, to be moving and comforting, irrespective of religious difference. I'm not sure why I can't say that with quite the same conviction of the Requiem on the previous occasion, though it was good to see a faithful Catholic leave us according to the Church's rites.

No problem with the music on either day. The family provided organist and voices for the Pergolesi Stabat Mater and voices for the Faure In Paradisum, and the hymn-singing was rousing.

[NorthernTenor]

I wonder whether the priest will permit us the BoCP Sentences when I go? Perhaps a contribution to the organ fund might help ...

[Boadicea]

The family provided organist and voices for the Pergolesi Stabat Mater, and voices for the Faure In Paradisum.

Not many in our parish would be familiar with the Pergolesi or Faure, so I doubt they would feature of many funeral arrangement lists here.

[presbyter]

There's a leaflet available on the Archdiocese of Birmingham website,

The request for a pamphlet came from one deanery who wanted to produce something simple that undertakers could give to a bereaved family. The original intention was to outline the stages of a Catholic funeral - explain them briefly - and guide the bereaved in choices of music (so that the priest or deacon would not have to face yet another request for a track from Elvis' Greatest Hits or Sinatra singing I did it my way). A draft of such a pamphlet was produced - and appears to have been rejected (it was based to some extent on what is already available on the Liturgy Office website). The pamphlet as it is, is not the product of any consultation with anyone in the diocese who knows something about liturgy and music and I am deeply saddened that the Archdiocese has produced something that, in my opinion, is very poor.

[NorthernTenor]

There's a leaflet available on the Archdiocese of Birmingham website,

The request for a pamphlet came from one deanery who wanted to produce something simple that undertakers could give to a bereaved family. The original intention was to outline the stages of a Catholic funeral - explain them briefly - and guide the bereaved in choices of music (so that the priest or deacon would not have to face yet another request for a track from Elvis' Greatest Hits or Sinatra singing I did it my way).

What a shame a good idea didn't come properly to fruition.