Resurrecting Oppressed Musicians

[Merseysider]

Just flicking back through old threads these two quotes really hit home:

In any congregation there will always be those who feel...musicians (and cantors in particular) are only doing what they do in order to gratify themselves and their vanity.

We're having a bit of a problem here – just over a year ago, 12 volunteers came forward to help me get a bit of music going in my new parish. Being the sort of ladies who volunteer selflessly for anything and everything, they are also involved as bingo callers, catchechists, cleaners, cooks, eucharistic ministers, fund raisers, parish visitors, readers, social organisers, welcomers – you name it. I can't think of one who does anything for any reason other than a genuine desire to help people in general and – in particular – to help our small parish grow.

Last week they were a tad upset. Someone had said to Teresa 2 (there are three of them): "Oh whenever Father wants anything doing, it's always the choir".

The complainant was ignoring the facts: 1) that these good souls had been working their socks off since for years before the choir was formed and 2) that Father is constantly asking/cajoling/inviting/begging other people to become more involved.

That statement has won me over for its honesty. The other thing to do, as well as exercising equality, is to try and practise transparency, as described by Marian Tolley in her powerful talks at Summer School 2002.

So true, Dot. Our wonderful volunteers don't go out of their way to practise transparency – but that's the way they're made. They just do – out of selflessness, out of charity, out of the people they are – they do it in love. And still they take flak for it.

I must seek out a transcript of Marian's talk – I hear nothing but good things about her up here.

I was once in a parish in missionary territory – Suffolk or Essex or somewhere equally south of God's own county – and the parish priest (having lost his rag with such in-fighting) one Sunday preached about back-biting, criticism, etc. – he threatened anyone making such attacks to come and see him personally – adding that they wouldn't leave without taking on one of the many jobs which needed doing. And slowly thereafter, the parish was transformed.

I'm lucky – I haven't personally suffered any of the hassle Crumhorn describes but I wonder how many people on here have – and how they've dealt with it – and how they've kept going in their ministry.

[contrabordun]

Our wonderful volunteers don't go out of their way to practise transparency

Probably because they
a are too busy volunteering to explain to what they're doing to those who aren't and
b think that if the non-volunteers were really that bothered, they'd put their time and energy where their mouths are...

[Dot]

In Marian's view, everyone has a ministry. She described the kind of tensions that Merseysider mentions. This is not a recollection of what she said but, perhaps, if everyone could identify with a particular role that they played within the parish the feelings of resentment would recede. I know, there are quite a lot of people who never put themselves forward, and have to be invited. OK, give 'em a job, but make sure it suits 'em.

It's always the case that a few people wear a lot of the hats - if you want a job done ask a busy person - but isn't it important to confine oneself to the hats that suit? Being left as music leader by default this weekend gives me a clear feeling that this is one hat I would rather not wear on a regular basis. "Willing and able" ought to be requirements for any duties undertaken except on an occasional basis.
The transparency thing may also be a function of aptitude for the task. For example, a good accompanist supports the choir and empowers the assembly without drawing attention to their own playing.

If tensions don't subside, the Tolley solution is to have a good hug!

Dot

[Merseysider]

Wise words indeed, Dot.

And Marian's hugging suggestion works in the workplace too – not that I physically hug my team as that's against company rules, but a little feather stroking goes down well.

[Dot]

Feather stroking is all very well, but I would advocate what I would call "nard slinging", the antidote to criticism. You can take a bit of criticism as long as you get a bit of admiration too for the things you get right.

[mcb]

isn't it important to confine oneself to the hats that suit?

I'd suggest not; or, at least, that you can't always see whether the hat suits when you're wearing it. Sometimes you take on a role not because you see yourself as suited for it, but because you know that someone is needed, and that you can do it if you have to. This is vocation too, just as much as if you've known what you're good at from an early age.

I speak from my own experience, of generally having been comfortable in the role of loyal lieutenant in lots of the musical activities I've been involved in. But just occasionally I've been hauled out of the comfort zone and pitched into the deep end, and have surprised myself by rising to the surface. (It's how I got to be a cathedral music director.) You never know what strengths can be found in the support and good will of the people you work with, or hidden in yourself, or, who knows, in the working of the Holy Spirit, until you give it a go.

Good luck this weekend, Dot!

M.

[Benevenio]

isn't it important to confine oneself to the hats that suit?

It is more important to listen to which house the hat is telling you to be in... the hat is always right!

mcb is correct: If we don't step outside our comfort zone, if we don't do the jobs that need doing rather than what suits us, we will never grow; growth is the only evidence of life.

I'm sure it will go well. Good luck!

[Dot]

growth is the only evidence of life.

Incorrect, according to what is taught at Key Stage 2 in Science.
Mrs Nerg is an acronym for no less than seven life processes: movement, reproduction, sensitivity, nutrition, excretion, respiration, growth.
I can wear the KS2 teacher's hat with comfort. If I wear the music leader's hat and find that I do not inspire the choir to sing with confidence, or the instrumentalists to play with confidence, never mind the congregation, then I am much better placed in a support role than a leader's role. There ought still to be room for growth within that support role.

Dot
(argumentative as ever)

[Tsume Tsuyu]

isn't it important to confine oneself to the hats that suit?

Almost everything I've done in my adult life, I've done because it needed doing, rather than because I was especially suited to the job. In most cases, I found I've sort of grown into the role. In some cases, I still feel uncomfortable and inadequate, but the jobs still need doing, so I'm persevering.

There is nothing I hate more than stepping out of my comfort zone but, if I'd confined myself to where I am comfortable, I'd have missed out on so much. My life is richer for challenges I've risen to.

And, just for the record, you inspire me to sing with confidence, Dot!

[Merseysider]

And if I'd stayed in my comfort zone I'd be spending Sunday mornings washing the car and mowing the lawn.

Can't tell you how nervous I am every Sunday morning – I wake up feeling ill, pace around the house and ask myself why I'm doing this. I drive to church with my head and stomach spinning round and wishing I was somewhere (anywhere) else.

And then the moment come when I stand in the centre aisle and say "Good morning and welcome...." and the nerves go. And then I look at the smiles and I remember why I'm there.

[Hare]

I take it that your "good morning" is the introduction to a congregational rehearsal?

Why do I never remember experiencing, let alone leading, one of these in my Free Church and, later, Anglican days?

[Merseysider]

Same here – but that's because we alternated between Merbecke and Rutter and we really didn't care if the assembly sang or not – they mostly didn't.

[Benevenio]

Incorrect, according to what is taught at Key Stage 2 in Science.
Mrs Nerg is an acronym for no less than seven life processes: movement, reproduction, sensitivity, nutrition, excretion, respiration, growth.

I'm sure that John Henry Newman - for it is his supposition that growth is the only evidence of life - was thinking more spiritually, more philosophically than your basic KS2 science approach. You can move, reproduce, sense, breathe, feed and crap all you like, but if spiritually you never grow, never develop, then there is little point in being. But that's just his opinion!

[mcb]

I'm sure that John Henry Newman - for it is his supposition that growth is the only evidence of life - was thinking more spiritually, more philosophically than your basic KS2 science approach. You can move, reproduce, sense, breathe, feed and crap all you like, but if spiritually you never grow, never develop, then there is little point in being. But that's just his opinion!

Are you thinking of "To live is to change; to be perfect is to have changed often"? (Or does JHN mention growth in some other less famous quotation? ) By that reckoning Mrs Nerg's other attributes will do just as well as signs of life.

M.

[musicus]

Newman's classic An Essay on the Development of Christian Doctrine (1845) encapsulates his thinking about change and development in the Church. There is a useful summary article at http://www.litencyc.com/php/sworks.php?rec=true&UID=6676 The book itself is a fascinating read. Amazon UK says it is available in the Penguin Classics series (£9.62) and as a downloadable e-book (£6.15)!

Musicus